Not sure what to get Uncle Mark, who you really only know through your Facebook Feed? Need a quick and easy solution for your office’s secret Santa? Do you love your children, but not carefully follow their passing whims or interests?
We have a solution! Send them dinosaurs.
Everyone loves getting dinosaurs. It is never what they were expecting. No Furby. No BB-8. Not the latest iPhone. It’s an Argentinosaurus about to flatten your precious garden shed. Above you can see a couple of our 60 foot long Spinosaurus packing boxes full of smaller dinosaurs. It isn’t easy, but we ship every size of dinosaur worldwide. For dinosaurs that don’t fit in the standard 40-foot intermodal container we contract with shipping companies to take over some of their unused hull space for a nominal fee. Your new T-Rex can stay warm next to the engine room or head over to the ship’s bunks for a meal. It just means we have the lowest shipping costs in the industry.
While at this point the dinosaurs themselves won’t arrive before Christmas 2017, what better way to begin the new year than the constant drip, drip, drip of energetic and murderous dinosaurs arriving every few days? On Monday a two pound microraptor is harassing the cat. On Thursday a triceratops is inhaling the shrubbery next to your recipient’s front door as they cautiously peer out the window. What will they neighbors think? Give the gift of paranoia in 2018. The world isn’t getting any saner.
Using keywords you can select for the sort of dinosaurs that you want to send. Is your friend very fond of their garden? Only send them carnivorous dinosaurs with the keyword ‘carnivore’. They might not survive. But at least their beloved heirloom tomatos and cherished basil will be of no interest to the pack of Deinonychus that showed up on their doorstep.
All dinosaurs are treated humanely. We operate cage-free facilities and although when out for delivery dinosaurs must be contained for long periods, we typically give them lots of time outdoors to walk about.
Each dinosaur comes with a handy 41-page instruction and training manual along with a small plastic clicker and some tasty treats. Dinosaur temperaments vary quite a bit. It may not do your recipient much good when a bellowing Allosaurus is between him and his instruction booklet. Good luck with that. Perhaps he can distract his new Allosaurus with a juicy steak. They love those.